Sandy Hook Promise, a nonprofit educational group created in the wake of a mass school shooting, is now training Bronx District 9 students to spot the signs of social isolation and reach out with a friendly gesture in hopes of creating safer school communities.
Created after a gunman killed 20 children and six adults at Sandy Hook Elementary in Newtown, Conn. on Dec. 14, 2012, Sandy Hook Promise’s “Know the Signs” programs have trained millions of students and staff across the country. The programs are credited with preventing at least 16 credible planned school shootings.
CIS 303 in the Morris Heights neighborhood, which has about 300 sixth- through eighth-grade students, partnered with Sandy Hook Promise last year and is seeing positive results. An Oct. 8 training session for all students centered around a simple mantra: “Start with hello.”
“Because it’s such a simple message, it’s really resonant,” Assistant Principal Danielle Lerro told the Bronx Times.
In the training, students discussed the difference between alone and lonely, guided by Sara Militello, a former educator and associate vice president of implementation and partner success with Sandy Hook Promise. While time alone is healthy for everyone, prolonged isolation and loneliness can lead young people into despair and potentially violence.
Militello talked the students through different actions they can take — ranging from small to big to giant — to help others feel included. Anything from commenting on a social media post to inviting someone to walk home after school can make a big difference, she told the students.
Simple conversation starters can also help get things started, Militello said. “What’s your favorite chip?” she asked the roomful of eighth graders — and dozens of hands shot up and side conversation broke out. Asking “Would you rather only keep Tik Tok or Instagram?” yielded even more chatter, showing how easy it can be to get to know others.
Near the end of the training, Militello challenged the students to write a note to someone in the school giving them a compliment. Example compliments started flowing: “I like your hair.” “Nice outfit.” “I like it when you help me during class.”
These kinds of connections are what Sandy Hook Promise is all about — weaving violence prevention concepts throughout the school day and establishing norms of kindness.
‘Always warning signs’
When students are connected to each other and to adults in the building, it becomes easier for them to report any problematic behaviors, said Crystal Garrant, chief program officer for Sandy Hook Promise.
“In incidents of violence, there are always warning signs,” she told the Bronx Times.
The trainings within Bronx District 9 have been tailored to local needs, which differ from those in places like Newtown, a relatively affluent suburb. Eventually, all 48 schools within the district (Claremont, Concourse, Highbridge, Morrisania, University and Morris Heights) will receive Sandy Hook Promise training.
“When young people are in their local community, they’re seeing a lot,” including violence and poverty, and the programs aim to understand the contexts in which students are living, said Garrant.
Much of the education involves learning a shared language around preventing isolation and speaking up when they see troubling signs. For instance, students at CIS 303 refer to teachers as “trusted adults” whom they can always turn to.
Garrant said while the problem of gun violence in America often seems overwhelming, the “Know the Signs” programs aim to combat that feeling of powerlessness.
“Violence is preventable,” she said. “We’re putting the knowledge and skills of school structures … to address a pressing issue in our country.”
Join the club
In the auditorium, students discussed reasons why they might stay quiet when they see someone looking like they need a friend.
“You might think they’re gonna judge you,” one said. “You’re not sure if they want to talk to you,” said another.
But a dedicated group of eighth graders at CIS 303 are going out of their comfort zone as members of the SAVE (Students Against Violence Everywhere) Promise Club, which enlists older students to serve as mentors to incoming sixth graders.
The club — which has 25 members plus a wait list — meets twice weekly during the school day to plan activities that bridge the gap between “veteran” students and those just coming in. Sixth graders need to be taught school norms and expectations while also feeling welcomed, said Lerro, who supervises the club.
Barely a month into the new school year, “Some of my eighth graders know all the sixth graders’ names,” she said.
Lerro said SAVE mentors are taught that reporting low-level problems — which can easily escalate into serious situations — is critical to school safety. “It’s not snitching. You’re being a good friend by reaching out.”
Students in the club are creating positive connections in their school and beyond. Last year, five SAVE members went to Charlotte for a national conference — the first time on an airplane for three of them. And recently, Lerro brought mentors and mentees to Edge at Hudson Yards, a 100-story glass observatory deck overlooking the whole city.
An eighth grader named Yazmin spoke with the Bronx Times about her experience in the SAVE Promise Club. She said the Hudson Yards trip, her first time there, was a great way to break the ice with younger students. “We got to walk around and get to know each other.”
Yazmin said she often sees sixth graders alone and looking overwhelmed. But as a club member, she knows when and how to intervene. “It’s an opportunity to help others who need help,” she said.
Yazmin appreciates that other students view her as a role model, someone trustworthy and helpful to all. “It makes me feel good about myself.”
Reach Emily Swanson at eswanson@schnepsmedia.com or (646) 717-0015. For more coverage, follow us on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram @bronxtimes