Three things every divorce lawyer should have handy on his desk:
°A box of tissues for the client.
°A calculator to figure the alimony.
° Lois Tarter’s book, The Divorce Ritual.
That last item is to get the client through - and happily beyond - her divorce.
Now re-married, Tarter went through HER divorce with some sorrows until she found it was a heckuva lot better to CELEBRATE it.
And with each new discovery - from a Greek restaurant that lets you smash plates at a buck a pop (she smashed 25 for each year of marriage) to breaking out the popcorn and renting divorce-themed flicks - she got hooked on writing a blog (YourDivorceDay.com) and became a divorce party planner.
Her fame soon spread, with her articles in The Huffington Post, SheKnows and MORE Magazine.
Then came her book, chock full of easy to read, unique, fun and inspiring suggestions for the newly “freed” woman.
Bronx attorney Will Madonna, who has handled his share of high-profile divorce cases, agreed with the sentiment and theme of Tarter’s book.
“My female clients view it two ways - a sense of failure and a period of mourning.
“I tell them other than adjusting financially, once they feel comfortable enough, they should move on completely. It might involve some counseling and therapy - or just joining a gym or a dating service.”
Tarter has a whopping 85 “divorce rituals” to get women on their feet and back out into the happy world of singlehood.
That includes dumping every reminder of HIM, from the “his and hers” towels to his Viagra bottle in the medicine cabinet.
Also on her ritual list:
°Throwing a divorce party - for HER friends.
°Renting one of those “divorce movies” like “The War of the Roses,” “Kramer vs. Kramer,” and yes, even “The Odd Couple.”
°Trying a new look, including snip, snip, snip, a new hair style.
As Tarter writes in the book’s introduction, “Regardless of what you may think, life is not over after a divorce. The only thing that’s over is a bad marriage (and who needs that?).”
The Divorce Ritual. (Canal Publishing House). Available at Amazon.com.